you know what i hate?

I hate how every minute I’m not reading something I’m supposed to read, or writing something I’m supposed to write, or grading something I’m supposed to grade is a minute that I’m thinking of all the things I’m supposed to be reading, writing, and grading. I could be watching The Gilmore Girls, say, or listening to Radiohead, or practicing scales on my beloved new guitar, or playing chess with L, or brushing the knots out of my perpetually knotted 17-year-old Persian cat, or reading something for pleasure (which I vaguely remember doing once), or chatting on IM with any number of people, but noooooooo! I have work to do.

And honestly, I can’t tell if I’m just exceptionally bad at managing my time or if this is what it’s like for everyone with an academic job.

Update: I’m just being a big baby. The world is too much with me.

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5 thoughts on “you know what i hate?

  1. I constantly feel that way. I’ve been trying to figure out if this is connected to an academic work ethic or if it’s related to a more general cultural logic. It’s pretty frustrating: I’m actually trying to half-watch the Braves game while I write. Not sure it’s working, and I’m not allowing myself to enjoy the game….

  2. Yes.
    It’s like this for anyone with an academic job (she writes as she procrastinates at grading yet again to read stuff she wants to read when she should be reading stuff that pains her).
    but feel free to add me to your IM list if you want another distraction. Judging by post times, we seem to keep similar hours.
    AIM: oyzani

  3. Thanks for the feedback. I just feel stuff piling up, as it sometimes does during the semester. Not too much grading yet, frankly, but lots of reading, and some grant deadlines that are approaching and for which I am wrestling with grant language. Given my unsuccessful attempts last year, I’m feeling somewhat gun shy.
    Here’s me being cocky:
    And here’s me not being cocky:
    And what do you know? I’m reading _Pamela_ again!

  4. The line from Wordsworth reads “out of tune” yet under the influence of your entry, upon re-reading the well-known poem, I snagged: “out of time”.
    Ah, the subtle difference between “having time” and “being in time” or in tune with other temporalities.
    The Invisible Adjunct in an entry date August 24, 2003, quotes the begining of To His Coy Mistress as a title and informs the reader:
    “How goes the enemy”? used to mean (among other things), “What time is it?” I think this meaning should be revived.

  5. I think you should feel guilty just because you want to watch the Gilmore Girls.
    I know. It’s supposed to be a good show. Even my *dad* says so. Good grief.
    (and yes, I should be doing something else right now besides building your comment count)

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